Random Thoughts.....What Are You Thinking?

it's a very complicated issue and it's not easy to empathize and understand with everyone's specific mindsets at their specific moments so I would never beat yourself up at all over it feeling so foreign.

1. Everyone is the hero in their own narrative. So people will always try to view their own intentions in the best light as a default, and that motivates a great deal of behavior that might annoy or confuse you.

2. People always default to what is familiar for them. So if someone has always grown up around outwardly angry situations or never learned adequate emotional tools to process their anger, you will see a great deal of their behavior viewed through an angry lens they default to etc. Anger could also have become a familiar default and a currency they understand best etc

This is also the same mindset regarding normalizing behavior and whatever has been normalized for the individual is what they will have bias to default to, regardless of what emotion or mindset it may be and how unhealthy or detrimental it may be to their own wellbeing etc

3. Logical behavior and efficient problem solving behavior is a learned skill. We'll meet a lot of people without those tools or practice utilizing them, and plain lacking that kind of thought processing completely, a lot of their behavioral paths taken will make a lot more sense to you if you can view this as a learned tool not yet acquired. I come across a lot more of a victim mentality as a reason for this, where all situations default to an ideal similar to, "why does this happen to me?" or "why does the world do this to me" and they are viewing their life as a bystander that things just happen to them etc

so if someone is in that mindset as their default approach in the day to day, they wouldnt prioritize problem solving or troubleshooting like you or I would. they would prioritize complaining types of attention and normalize behavior along the lines of giving up or depending on others to solve all their problems instead.


There is also the plain risk that a person is using the anger as a tool to try and manipulate others, which is a completely different thing and I try hard to avoid that kind of behavior. I used to spend a lot of my youth just manipulating others into whatever I wanted and ended up hating the kind of person I became.