So they had this rave music thing at soldier field not too long ago and as I'm walking home I find someone passed out in the dog park and against all better judgement I checked to see if the person was ok. Took em a minute to get up but as they were drunkenly drugged out still decided to screm out YOLO... I was like yes... yes.. you should probably get tested for that... got em to call someone to come get em then left when the ride came...
My first trip was a quick circle around the dock just to make sure I could work an oar without blowing a heart valve.
I felt like I had a pretty good handle on it. The lake was as smooth as glass and the canoe was fairly easy to handle.
Filled with hubris I struck out again the next day. The current, now fed by twenty mile an hour winds, grabbed a hold of my little canoe and sucked me down the lake about as far as your eyes can see on a clear day.
I fought against it the whole time, trying in vain to turn the little boat around... But I just kept going until I started crashing into ***.... <insert sound of boat running aground in the sand here>
Paddling wasn't working at all so I tried using the oar like a pole to push off the bottom, which was fine until I tried to navigate around a dock jutting out into the water, got into water that was too deep and got sucked back down the lake again. Some kid fishing near by asked if I was trying to get to the dock I was crashing into. NO!!! I screamed back.
I was sitting in the back of the canoe trying different things and realized I could move somewhat in the right direction if I paddled backwards... which is not any fun... but it gave em the idea that if I sat closer to the front I might make some head way.
And it worked!!! Hurray! I knelt behind the front seat and started going the right way and everything. Whoopie! Yeah! All right! Wooo!
wooo... ah..... aw crap!
I ran out of gas... but as soon as I slowed my paddling I started getting pulled back down to where I started... So I kinda paddled in place for what seemed like forever. I weighed my options.
Allow the current to suck me back down to the beach and take a nap...
Jump out of boat and walk it back by dragging it behind me as I hugged the shore line....
Paddle until my arms fell off.....
Then a father and son puttered up along side me in a pontoon fishing boat and asked how I was doing... and mercifully gave me a tow up the lake.
While trying to control their laughter they explained that when they saw me start loosing ground the third time, after figuring out the position inside the boat thing, they decided it was time for a rescue. LOL! The son said it was impossible for one person to properly control a two man canoe... for very long. Which I had already learned on my own the hard way....
They asked if I wanted them to go past my own dock so that I could pretend I had circumnavigated the entire lake... But I was too wave whipped to care about such things. So they took me all the way in.
I thanked them and went inside to rest and lick my wounds and tell my wife where I had been the last few hours... and laugh at myself.
which isn't exactly a top tourist destination.... But Niagara Falls is near by and my kids have never been there so...
We reach the border and I hand the border stooge my and my wife's drivers license... and I'm still as loud and obnoxious as ever, perhaps even more so after our stay in Yellingville, Maine. So I'm bold and he is italic because he is a canadian weeinie with no balls and a name tag that says "Tiffany" and the conversation goes something like
Where are your passports? Passports!? For Canada!? /frownie face - You need passports to cross international boundaries For Canada!? Since when? /more frowning /pointing - The sign right there says PLEASE HAVE YOUR PHOTO ID READY roll down your back window... who is that with you? My son! who doesn't have a driver's license...or photo id...because he isn't sixteen yet...you *** dumbass...
and this went on for a while... he tried to accuse me of smuggling someone over the border without documentation....
Then he told us to pull under the canopy and go inside but first some other *** hassles me about where I parked... Why didn't you park in the first spot?because I'm not handicapped no, the other one and I just stared back at him like the dumb *** he was until he said never mind
inside immigration on our side of the glass is everyone that looks foreign... on the other side are twelve *** drinking coffee and making people wait for no reason.
Finally after a bunch of bad noise they decide they can't let us into the country without proper ID for my son and we gladly take our leave of canada.... after two hours of getting *** around.
I could imagine myself fighting with the water til I passed out then woke up on the beach telling everyone I chose option a to take a nap on the beach...
Ahhh pontoon boats... they are awesome for taking a nap on the water and taking 7 hours to get 3 miles down the way but they are awful for tubing and water skiing... those summers on the lake... getting passed by people on paddleboats...
I could imagine myself fighting with the water til I passed out then woke up on the beach telling everyone I chose option a to take a nap on the beach...
I unwisely left my cell phone at the house in case I went into the drink.... I should have put it in a couple of zip lock bags.
I had no way to let my wife know what had happened... I wondered how many hours I would have to be gone before she started wondering who she should call....
which isn't exactly a top tourist destination.... But Niagara Falls is near by and my kids have never been there so...
We reach the border and I hand the border stooge my and my wife's drivers license... and I'm still as loud and obnoxious as ever, perhaps even more so after our stay in Yellingville, Maine. So I'm bold and he is italic because he is a canadian weeinie with no balls and a name tag that says "Tiffany" and the conversation goes something like
Where are your passports? Passports!? For Canada!? /frownie face - You need passports to cross international boundaries For Canada!? Since when? /more frowning /pointing - The sign right there says PLEASE HAVE YOUR PHOTO ID READY roll down your back window... who is that with you? My son! who doesn't have a driver's license...or photo id...because he isn't sixteen yet...you *** dumbass...
and this went on for a while... he tried to accuse me of smuggling someone over the border without documentation....
Then he told us to pull under the canopy and go inside but first some other *** hassles me about where I parked... Why didn't you park in the first spot?because I'm not handicapped no, the other one and I just stared back at him like the dumb *** he was until he said never mind
inside immigration on our side of the glass is everyone that looks foreign... on the other side are twelve *** drinking coffee and making people wait for no reason.
Finally after a bunch of bad noise they decide they can't let us into the country without proper ID for my son and we gladly take our leave of canada.... after two hours of getting *** around.
and I am already planning my revenge....
prepare to die canadian scum
Now imagine that the United States is being ravaged by war and crime and you don't want to raise your kids in a place like that while dealing with the frustrations of the border.
Now imagine that the United States is being ravaged by war and crime and you don't want to raise your kids in a place like that while dealing with the frustrations of the border.
/folds arms
No.
I'm too tired to imagine... PARKER! throw a temper tantrum on the floor right there for me.
I could imagine myself fighting with the water til I passed out then woke up on the beach telling everyone I chose option a to take a nap on the beach...
Ahhh pontoon boats... they are awesome for taking a nap on the water and taking 7 hours to get 3 miles down the way but they are awful for tubing and water skiing... those summers on the lake... getting passed by people on paddleboats...
Hmmm...What are those hybrids of pontoon boats/bass trackers called? Is there a name for those at all? Seconded the notion of pontoons being terrible for water skiing, tubing, and wake boarding.
Ugh! It terrifies me when Lukas intentionally bangs his head while throwing a fit. AHHHHHH!!!
EDIT: I asked the pediatrician about it, she said it was normal. I hate it though.
My son used to belly flop off the backs of chairs onto his chest for fun. Broke his lower ribs (greenstick) so many times they stick out now.... I think he did it to hear us gasp.
took him to the Doctor and he did a swan dive off the table when the doc turned his attention away from him for ten seconds...
"it must not be hurting him too much for him to keep doing it like that....hopefully he grows out of it... >.> "
Hmmm...What are those hybrids of pontoon boats/bass trackers called? Is there a name for those at all? Seconded the notion of pontoons being terrible for water skiing, tubing, and wake boarding.
Ahh, the warm weather, the wind in your hair while the boat is in motion, the water is just right... "Jump in!" they say, you get a good run for your jump, one, two, three steps, then it happens; you step on a rusty fishing hook that was dropped into the boat's carpet four years ago. Yeah, *** summer.
So we have had some fruit fly issues at work.
Is got handed out a lure-trap, so I placed it under this huge *** spider web.
A lot of em flyes are missing now.
Edit: As of 2010-10-05 14:48:06 CST, Ni reached 10,000 pages.
Since we all can't be on the same linkshell in game, this can be our cross server linkshell thread.
Like most linkshells, it can be pretty dead at times. Other times it's full of intense conversations about either rl, gear, goals, pokemon or anything else you want to contribute.
We can cover any sort of topic at all, within reason of the forum rules. No real main topic, just a bunch of FFXIAH friends/people coming on and discussing random things.
Yeah Chuu. Bringing you up to speed, Ludoggy is the LS pedophile. I'm the fountain of random and useless knowledge that makes you go "Hrm" with the occasional side of "holy shit he said what?"
Kungfu is the LS nutjob, spouting super random things that are usually sexist, until Savvy or Alyria comes into the room. Then he's a classic case of sexual harrassment. Rumaha is also true to the second part; we're wondering about his sexuality though.
Daj is Ludoggy's gay lover. Not much else is known about this Asuran. Tairo is kinda new, but since is a female and Alyria's lesbian lover, she fit right in real quick.
Celene(F) and Rowland(M) are more of the shyer members, but often say things that are witty, have a good pun and sometimes cause three page discussions. Celene hates when people hit on her. It doesn't stop them from trying.
Krizz is just social and likes to kill time here during work Tbest is about the same, except tends to be a douche to guys and affectionate toward girls.
Alyria is the most social female, gets groped a lot without provoking it by others, and Tairo ends up stabbing people for it. Cai is just a barrel of lols, I might be gay for him. If I wasn't straight.
Not sure about Citag, s/he's new. Kiriyu is just an in-out kinda person. Says one thing every three days that every guy makes a big fuss over. Ludoggy gets really defensive since she's asian and underage (might be 18 now).
Artem is the wayward soul that makes you ponder the meaning of life by constantly reminding us life can suck. But he deals, and so do we. About the same for Savannah, except people are more "AWH!" to her because of a vagina involved.
Dasva is the ex military man (as is Krizz but this doesn't apply to him) who hates the world and plots a way to destroy most of it.
Number2 is kinda like a mix between Cai and I; never bashes, likes to laugh and has odd avatars. His current suits a lot of the convos this LS gets into. Barti is most well known for his moustache. He gives mousatche rides for a fee. I'm missing a few people but whatever. CARRY ON!
Luelle Smells.
Roster of FFXIAH Ni (as of April 1st, 2010 Pocoyo avatar craze)
Happy b-day ls.
Heres my lame gift to AHLS, since Row is lame and took away the OP, I made my own!
Haseyo/Bignose: He's got a bigass nose, Leader of the RL avi revloution or some junk no one gives a crap about...crazy about his asian pop/rock bands and is a closet pedo. AKA LAME
Dameshi: wont level his sam sub and is a lolblu, LAME
Citag: Doesnt put out, Really lame
Dasva: Uses Chu as a cover up for his desire for me greased up and naked on his bed, Lame.
Rydiya/Bra+Panties: Secret lesbien, doesnt wear bra+panties, like to knit and other old people stuff (bingo)
Pikachu/Chu: Hi Chu, I love chu
Kryee/Socks: Noms on socks, wears the sam red pair everyday and frequently sniffs her arm pits.
Cheyne: Domo origoto, Mr Roboto...I think he's gay.
Urial: SOCCER IS LAME AND YOU'RE LAME.
Thundars: LOLCANADIAN
Spence: LOLFRENCHCANADIAN
Enterius/ghost: He's a ghost...he'll say something witty to me later.
Ixe: Ducky face and cant seem to get a straw in her mouth (can get other things in there though)
Mairah: She cool...lame
Bart: Full times OPO-OPO, free mustache rides otherwise LAME
Sav/Mango: Field trips, yay!
Aly/thatgreenmodthatwillbanmeifIsayanythingbad: *tapes*
Woody: You're not Italian...no tea for you.
Sectum: My apprentice...loves asian girls, loves to cook...he's awesome. put me in a story where I wasnt a pedo and that'd cool
Rum:STOP RAIDING MY BASEMENT AND TAKING AWAY MY GIRLS GAWD. Long Islander...lame
Valencea:Wont tell me the color of her undies, you lost the bet...no we cant get married...NO MEANS NO
Kojo:Open pedo...he likes scat, ewww
Tohsou: I think he's a pedo with a girlfriend as cover up, lame.
Kiriyu/strawberry: Lurk Less post moar! I see you what you are doing!
Krizz: Mohawk guy #1
Triet: Mohawk guy #1...wait
Bloodbathboy: The Hulk
Kungfuhustle: AH%DUE%$JNSRGHSRHHEYHEHSA Y%HEDHGSR EAT AHUYY DONKEY NUTS
Celene: Quit...Canadian...who the hell quits?
Tbest: MIA
Eternaltriumph: Where the hell has he been? Is he gone cause he got pussywhipped or something? Whatever...
#2: GOD...I miss him /cry
Luelle/otherlu: The Other Lu.
Zekky: Quit, kicking ass, raped me :\
Krystale/Girlwithpiercing: Magnets stick to her, Toke Canadian, hawt...she's 15 right?
Marzbarz: NINJA
Rowland: All your Pocoyo are belong to...him
Weewoo/Tool: He liked Asura and wont admit it.
Miemo: Has a mithra avi c.c
Kalyna: is a girl right? right? oh...lame
Gimmeurselables: TOO MUCH BOUNCE...TOO BIG, EWWWW
Sagittario: Lame elf whu runs around in a diaper subligar
Ludoggy: Faggot
Edit: The Family Ni Tree
Luelle's (And Citag's too!) birthday present
[h1]H1[/h1]
[h2]H2[/h2]
[h3]H3[/h3]
[figlet]Figlet[/figlet]
[spoiler="Custom spoiler!"][h1]Yay[/h1][/spoiler]
[soundcloud]http://soundcloud.com/matas/hobnotropic[/soundcloud]
Will try to get to more stuff when I can.
Disclaimer: Your Feelings May Get Hurt In Your Stay Here.