Random Thoughts.....What Are You Thinking?

I don't know if anyone can give perspective but can a person who isn't good with people be happy? Eventually alone (not by choice but because of being socially inept) with no friends, family or significant other? Do you eventually learn to communicate with people or is being a 20something year old too late? I have the social skills of like an 8 year old, is there really a place in the world for someone like that?

There's always a place in the world for people, sometimes it's just not as obvious as we'd like it to be. I make poo jokes and the word vagina still amuses me so I may or may not have 8 year old social skills as well but that doesn't matter. The trick is to find people who enjoy being with you as you are and cling to their legs and don't let go rather than thinking there is something wrong with you.

For my part because reasons I have a hard time not just letting myself get close to people but also letting people get close to me. I have doubts I'll ever have someone I can call a significant other but I've still managed to stumble upon people who I can say with confidence value me as a friend, despite me being the way I am. It might not be an instant thing, one of my friends we knew each other for a year and barely talked now we text each other random ***every day.

I'm not the best at articulating this sorta thing so forgive me if that's not very helpful. I guess what I'm trying to say is not only is there a place for people that struggle socially but there are many. If things look bleak today maybe tomorrow you'll trip and fall into one of those places, or maybe someone will guide you to one, and maybe there will be nachos.

I'd say half of my friends get pretty bad social anxiety, so hopefully I can help in some way. As I understand it, there are a few ways people deal with it. One is medication, which I usually question because side effects. Another is trying a social hobby (if they're available), like classes, writing workshops, theater, etc. In my experience, those places have a good amount of people with the same anxieties or who don't mind it in others, though you'd have to give it time to see that in people. There are also assorted techniques and therapies, with stuff like practicing social things, positive thinking reinforcement, and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone more and more. Lastly, I suggest that if you can, try to be open to the people closest to you about it and let them know you need their support.

Of all of these, I really only know about the second and fourth. I'm very active at a local theater where they hold a variety of classes and workshops, and I see anxious people growing more and more comfortable in social settings. Better yet, I usually can spot when those people would make good friends and so I sorta trick them both into hanging out, with me in the middle, until they realize they're comfortable being together. I guess that doesn't help you directly, but the point is that it's never too late and there's always hope.