I ran out rq so missed a few things but this is a good topic and I have few things to say before the conversation ends and I'm way l8 (prob already am)
Wait this is something that people actually experience?
Self confidence and love can be an amazing thing. There's a dark side to having too much of it though just like anything :P
I don't know how serious you are but, I can credit my parents. They were very sure to instill me with lots of confidence from a young age. To the point I had too much of it and had to get more on board with reality. Some might say it was a nice problem to have but the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I envied things people with less confidence would have. I also envied their perception, and often their drive. Not everyone handles everything all in the same way but... one of my best friends from college really struggled with liking himself. But I loved to hang around him because he had these insights into reality I would totally miss. I think we helped each other out.
This was very well put. Again I was being somewhat sarcastic but I have a really low self esteem. I'm able to function pretty well in a day-to-day life (I go to a good university and am involved) but I just feel like an outsider... But this uh... problem I have may be feeding into this desire I have to isolate... And while I know it's bad I'm too apathetic to fix it.
With that being said, I am fortunate enough to have people in my life that have a similar view to you and they have my utmost respect and affection (possibly platonic love I suppose it would be called). My relationship with this one person seems to be similar to the relationship you had with your friend but he feels the same way as me... just slightly less of a desire to be alone, but there are many factors contributing to that.
Not to say I'm not social tho! Few weeks ago I posted about going to see Shlohmo then partying with him at some club that his record label was throwing an afterparty at. Past Wednesday I went to see Qrion, Maxo, Grimecraft, Diversa and The Hair Kid and got to meet them all. I talk to Grimecraft like all the time on facebook, it's really cool. Also apparently my friend (the one I was just referencing) his sister is somewhat dating Diversa so it's all really synchronicistic (idk if that's a word but a present tense for synchrony is what I was looking for)
And this past Saturday I went the PC Music afterparty (couldn't get ticket to the real show) and got to like meet/converse with all of them and also dance to their amazing music.
Qrion was there and she remembered me too! Sadly her manager messaged me on Facebook (the only social media I have... to tell me to take down the sweet video I took of her set... Q_Q ... here's the
Grimecraft one for anyone who wants it... (he gave me permission to keep it up and said it's stupid I'd have to take to Qrion's down)
I showed QT that I was talking to Grimecraft while the event was going on and she suggested we send him a selfie lol cos he was sad he couldn't be there:
***i got way off topic and we were on pg 17334 when I stated typing thing lol. getting distracted by studying for this ridiculous history final I have tomorrow...
